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Apex Parasite

$666.00 $31.99
Free shipping for everyone. Promotion auto-applied on checkout.

Official uniform item issued by the Department of Human Replication
Features an anatomical breakdown of the target entity (Homo sapiens, Genus: Viruses) Warning signs include an inflated ego, a severe lack of conscience, immunity to shame, and an alarming willingness to do absolutely anything for cold, hard cash
This garment serves as a visual identifier for low-conscience entities operating within public spaces
The Department of Human Replication is not liable for any disturbing experiences encountered while wearing this graphic

*Approach with extreme caution*  

Scientists have confirmed that vaccines are entirely ineffective against the Homo sapiens strain
Symptoms include an uncontrollable urge to do disturbing things for money and apologizing right before ruining everything
Deal with it by wearing the official ID badge

Or just buy the shirt. 100% slop certified.

BUYSLOP

#wellness #mindfulness #selfcare #holistichealth

Select size

More details

  • 100% cotton
  • Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
  • Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
  • Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
  • Heavyweight fabric (5 oz)
  • Regular fit
  • Pre-shrunk jersey knit

Quality Guarantee & Returns

  • Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
  • Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.

Apex Parasite Size Guide

Size guide preview
Size label Length Width Sleeve length
S
28
18
15.63
M
29
20
17
L
30
22
18 1/2
XL
31
24
20
2XL
32
26
21 1/2
3XL
33
28
22.8
4XL
34
30
24.2
5XL
35
32
25.3

Our suppliers provide the measurements. There may be a deviation of up to 2 inches (5 cm) in the product dimensions.

A useful tip! Compare measurements with a product you already own at home by measuring it and matching it to the sizes in this guide.

A Length

Start the tape at the collar's top next to the shirt's highest point on the shoulder. Extend the tape to the shirt's bottom.

B Width

Begin at the seam just under one sleeve and extend the tape across to the seam under the other sleeve.

C Sleeve length

Start measuring from the back center of the collar, follow the top seam of the sleeve to the shoulder, secure the tape at the shoulder, and continue down to the end of the sleeve.

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